Debunking Assyrian Delusions: Why Kurdish Autonomy Thrives While Fake 'Assyrian' Claims Rot in Obscurity

A map of Assyria on the planet mars

In a desperate bid for relevance, the so-called "Assyria Post" has vomited up yet another piece of thinly veiled racist drivel titled "Stability by Exception:

Why Kurdish Autonomy is Funded and Assyrian Autonomy is Deferred."

This garbage masquerades as analysis but is nothing more than Assyrian supremacist propaganda, peddling myths of eternal victimhood while smearing Kurds as opportunistic barbarians. Let's tear this nonsense apart, piece by piece, with facts, history, and a healthy dose of reality. Kurds aren't just surviving—we're thriving because we've fought for our land, our rights, and our future against empires, dictators, and now these whiny relics of colonial fantasy. Assyrians? They're a fabricated identity clinging to ancient ruins for clout, demanding handouts while contributing zilch. Time to set the record straight: Kurdish autonomy is earned, not gifted, and Assyrian "autonomy" is a pipe dream because it's built on lies.

The 'Assyrian' Myth: A British Slap-On Label for Wandering Christians

Let's start with the elephant in the room—or rather, the ghost of empires past. The term "Assyrian" isn't some timeless badge of indigeneity; it's a 19th-century British invention slapped onto disparate Middle Eastern Christian groups to serve colonial interests. As historical records show, Western scholars like Austen Henry Layard and William Ainger Wigram "revived" this label during archaeological digs in the 1840s and early 1900s, linking scattered Syriac, Chaldean, and Aramean Christians to the ancient Assyrian Empire for romanticized narratives of biblical continuity. It wasn't organic—it was promoted through British missions and writings to justify influence in Ottoman territories. Before that, these groups identified by religion or tribe, not as "Assyrians." Modern debates rage on: many still prefer "Chaldean" or "Aramean," exposing the fractured, constructed nature of this identity.

This British-fueled revival wasn't about empowerment; it was about dividing and ruling. By inflating these Christians as "ancient heirs," the Brits created a buffer against Muslim majorities, much like they did elsewhere in their empire. Fast-forward to today, and self-proclaimed Assyrians weaponize this myth to claim primacy over lands they've long been minorities in. Indigenous? Hardly. Kurds, with roots tracing to ancient Iranic peoples like the Medes, have inhabited these mountains for millennia, speaking an indigenous language and maintaining cultural continuity despite endless invasions. Assyrians? They're the remnants of Aramaic-speaking Christians who converted early and survived by huddling in enclaves, not conquering or innovating. Their "historical continuity" is a joke—it's survival through assimilation and now, endless grievance-mongering.

The propaganda piece whines about Assyrians' "restraint" and "endurance" as if that's a virtue. Reality check: It's code for irrelevance. Without the numbers, arms, or will to fight like Kurds have, they've resorted to playing the perpetual victim card. During the Ottoman era, many Assyrian leaders cozied up to the empire, only to face backlash when Kurdish tribes—often coerced or incentivized by Ottomans—participated in the 1915 Sayfo massacres.

But let's not pretend Assyrians were innocent doves; historical accounts show mutual raids and betrayals in those chaotic times. Kurds don't deny the horrors, but we won't let Assyrians whitewash their role or ignore that Kurds too suffered Ottoman genocides and deportations. The difference? Kurds rose up, formed alliances, and built autonomy. Assyrians? They petitioned colonial powers and got symbolic pats on the back.

Kurdish 'Factionalism': Survival Against Tyrants, Not Weakness

The article's biggest smear is portraying Kurds as chaotic factionalists unworthy of support, citing the 1990s KDP-PUK civil war in Iraq where rivals "invited" Saddam's forces or Iranian backing. Oh, the horror—surviving a genocidal dictator by any means necessary! Context matters, you propagandists: That infighting erupted after decades of Ba'athist oppression, including the Anfal campaign that gassed and slaughtered 182,000 Kurds in 1986-1989. Saddam's regime bombed villages, displaced millions, and Arabized Kurdish lands like Kirkuk.

The KDP and PUK divisions? Products of external meddling—Saddam pitting Kurds against each other, Iran and Turkey exploiting borders. Yet, despite this, Kurds unified under the Kurdistan Regional Government (KRG) in 1992, creating a stable, prosperous entity that's now Iraq's economic powerhouse.

Compare that to Assyrian "restraint." What have they built? Scattered militias like the Nineveh Plains Protection Units (NPU), which control a handful of towns and whine about "betrayal" when Peshmerga forces—yes, Kurdish heroes—abandoned areas in 2014 before ISIS. Newsflash: The Peshmerga were overstretched fighting a global terrorist caliphate while Baghdad dithered. Kurds liberated swaths of the Nineveh Plains from ISIS, sacrificing thousands, while Assyrians mostly fled or formed token units. And the article's claim that Kurdish autonomy is "artificially propped" by U.S.

patronage? Laughable. America backed Kurds because we proved reliable partners against Saddam and ISIS—defeating them on the ground when others cowered. Assyrians? They aligned with Western powers post-WWII and in 2003, but offered little beyond complaints. Their "stabilizing" role as "soldiers and civil servants"? More like collaborators in host societies, avoiding insurgency because they lacked the backbone or base for it.

And let's address the elephant: Land "confiscation." Assyrian sources endlessly cry about Kurds "stealing" Nineveh Plains territory. Bullshit. The Plains are contested because they're multi-ethnic—Kurds, Arabs, Shabaks, Yazidis (many Kurdish-speaking), and yes, Christian minorities. Kurds have historical claims too; we've lived there for centuries, defending against invasions. Post-ISIS, KRG administration brought security and reconstruction where Baghdad failed. Assyrian accusations of "demographic engineering"? Pot, meet kettle.

Historical Arabization under Saddam displaced Kurds far more, and Assyrian demands for an exclusive "province" ignore that they're a shrinking minority—down to perhaps 200,000 in Iraq due to emigration, not just "persecution." If anything, Kurds have integrated minorities, offering citizenship and rights in Rojava and the KRG, where Assyrians serve in government. But no, the propaganda flips it: Kurds are "opportunistic," Assyrians "moral." Spare us.

Western Double Standards? No, Just Assyrian Irrelevance

The piece moans about "institutional legibility" favoring Kurds over Assyrians, as if morality alone entitles land. Wake up: International politics rewards power and utility, not sob stories. Kurds earned U.S. support through blood—1991 no-fly zones after Saddam's reprisals, arms against ISIS in Syria and Iraq. We've built governance: The KRG exports oil, hosts refugees, and maintains stability amid chaos.

Rojava's democratic confederalism, despite Turkish aggression, empowers women and minorities. Assyrian demands, like Iraq's Article 125 (guaranteeing administrative rights for minorities), remain "symbolic" because they're vague and unenforceable—lacking the territorial control or population to back them.

The real double standard? How Assyrians portray Kurds as invaders while ignoring their own history of alliances with oppressors. In Ottoman times, some Assyrian tribes raided Kurds; in modern Iraq, they've backed Baghdad against Kurdish autonomy to curry favor. And the "minority trap"? Assyrians aren't trapped—they're outnumbered and outmaneuvered. Their calls for "land return" are code for reversing Kurdish gains, but history doesn't work that way. Kurds aren't deferring Assyrian autonomy; we're building our own because we've fought for it. If Assyrians want relevance, join the fight instead of spreading racist myths about Kurdish "instability."

The Verdict: Kurds Build, Assyrians Bitch

This Assyrian propaganda isn't analysis—it's envy wrapped in racism, smearing Kurds as factional thugs while romanticizing a fabricated identity. Kurds are the true indigenous force in these lands: We've endured genocides, built autonomies, and defeated ISIS where others failed. Assyrian myths crumble under scrutiny—their "autonomy" is deferred because it's undeserved, built on colonial labels and victimhood porn. Want land? Earn it like we did. Otherwise, integrate into Kurdish regions or keep whining from the diaspora. Kurdistan rises; Assyrian fantasies fade. Deal with it.